Sunday, March 27, 2011
Today I woke up to tons of snow outside my window and a hotel full of christian teenagers
I re- read my entire blog this afternoon. I realize that I have left out so many important stories. Tons of truly incredible moments have passed that I have been afraid to publish because of who could possibly be reading this. Hopefully I will get a chance to share some of these moments in future stories I write, and if not then, maybe I will just verbally share them with any interested party. Four and a half days left here!
Monday, March 21, 2011
still counting down the days...
I have ten days left here! Spring break has just ended, so this place is back to being eerily quiet. During Spring Break (or Little Texas Time), I was counting down the days until I was able to experience some peace and quiet. Now that I have the peace and quiet I am in possession of some abandonment-like feelings. In Forestville, a man who lived there year round described something similar happening to him. I didn't quite understand it until now.
This particular rush brought in tons of pretty wonderful people. Lots of great conversation and a few nights where my stomach hurt from laughing so hard.
About a week ago I drove the two hours to Abiquiu, NM and took a hike at Ghost Ranch (where Georgia O'Keefe used to live and paint). It was amazing, almost in a sort of transformative way. At the end of the steep hike, I was happy to be alone up there at the top of the world, and I sat and wrote and sketched a little.
I read a book about Georgia O' Keefe recently. After she first moved to New Mexico from upstate New York, she talked about how happy and inspired she was by the browns of the New Mexican desert. She said something along the lines of "there is nothing but green in New York, and who wants to look at that all the time, let alone paint it?" Though I appreciate the browns of NM a little more now, I feel exactly the opposite. I crave greenery. I can't wait to get back to it.
I am just now getting over a two day hangover from the ridiculous amount of good beer that I drank at Brew Fest. After all the free beer and delicious goulash that we could handle, Sarah and I stumbled over a few snow covered hills (falling more times than I care to (or can) remember- cowboy boots are horrible in the snow, commandeered some tubes from the shed and did some illegal tubing down Strawberry Hill.
Later on that night we watched fireworks and torchlight skiers. I didn't have my camera, but here is a picture that Seth took of the events last year. This whole thing was in commemoration of the ski valley's creator, the deceased Ernie Blake. During this beautiful display we were wooed by yet another one of the ski valley's finest, a snowboarder bum yelling up at the sky "DO IT UP ERNIE BLAKE, YEAH DUDE, RED HOT, RED HOT!"
Later on that night we watched fireworks and torchlight skiers. I didn't have my camera, but here is a picture that Seth took of the events last year. This whole thing was in commemoration of the ski valley's creator, the deceased Ernie Blake. During this beautiful display we were wooed by yet another one of the ski valley's finest, a snowboarder bum yelling up at the sky "DO IT UP ERNIE BLAKE, YEAH DUDE, RED HOT, RED HOT!"
Also, I finally finished my quilt. I think its pretty awesome.
and a close up!
Ghost Ranch
This is where I was sitting until a bee chased me away
on the way home I found this lake
I sat on this bench and wrote some more (there were no bees here)
Here is a picture of part of the ski valley, (my beginner mountain is not pictured)
Jay, me and Bobby (the Austing Haus owners) the morning after Brew Fest
Oh yeah, I made this banana bread, it was the best banana bread i have had in my entire life.
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I cooked a beautiful vegetarian lasagna for my favorite people here
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and here we are the next morning, our little family portrait
This is what most sundays were like for me, sitting on the couch with Maria. And look there is Christopher in the reflection!
So, I haven't talked about Maria much in this blog. She is a wonderful lady from Germany whom I grew very close with while I was here. We spent a lot of time together talking about food, Europe, relationships, and our completely disparate pasts. She also made me some really beautiful jewelry.
I had to say goodbye to her today. It was really difficult. I am not sure what I would have done without her here. Her weekly chats on this couch while we beaded and sewed kept me feeling sane and less alone. I also don't know what I would do without her because she is going to find me a husband in Germany! (that last part is mostly a joke)
Saturday, March 5, 2011
Questa
Sarah and I were finally able to get a day off together. We drove an hour to Questa and went hiking on the La Junta trails at 'Wild Rivers'
Sarah and I
The Rio Grande River
The Red River (they call the park 'Wild Rivers' because it is where the two rivers connect)
Beautiful tree
This is the mountain we climbed; we hiked an 1,000 foot elevation change!
The first cactus I have seen in New Mexico
all of the trees and bushes out here look like snakes and spiders
Friday, March 4, 2011
the end is near!
Today Kim made Sarah and I's final schedule. March 31st is my last day of working at the Austing Haus. April 4th is my last day in Taos.
I am ready to go, but that does not mean I will not be a little sad when March 31st arrives.
I suppose I have a few regrets- maybe I should have tried to make more friends or possibly not written people off quite so quickly. I also should have worked less and instead left more time for exploration of this strange but lovely environment.
Besides those things (which I don't actually completely regret), I am unbelievably proud of myself. I survived four and a half months of bitter cold, loneliness, and men on vacation (I will explain later my absolute abhorring of men on vacation). I was mostly able to stay happy, too; my calls to Katherine complaining about how miserable I was were relatively infrequent.
Its also hard to regret anything when I think of how much I changed, how many things I learned to do, and all of the beauty I was able to experience here. First of all, I was able to make five very good friends, Sarah, Kim, Seth, Bobby and Maria. I hiked so many incredible trails, with and without snow shoes. I learned how to throw pots on a potter's wheel. I went tubing. I learned to ski! I visited an Earthship and befriended a group of wonderful hippie boys who lived inside of it. I learned how to cook and bake a few things all by myself. I sewed a bunch of purses and made a quilt. I read at least a book a week. I wrote a number of half finished stories, and three complete ones that I am sort of proud of. I visited a couple of different hot springs. I perfected my texan accent. I had many fascinating, hilarious, and enjoyable conversations with guests from all over the world. I didn't cry or yell at any of our less pleasant guests. I refused to put up with any shit from any shitty men.
This leads directly to my explanation as to why men on vacation are the WORST. Well, to begin, men on vacation are usually drunk. Drunk men are often awful without being on vacation. When they are on vacation, they are away from the restrictions of their 'normal' life, and act as if they have no restrictions at all. They are loud, rude, clumsy, and unapologetic. This is now my second job dealing with 'men on vacation,' and you wouldn't believe some of the lines I have heard. For the most part, I have never been seriously offended, but I would certainly prefer to live the rest of my life without being asked to accompany another old, hairy, overweight man in the hot tub, or asked to give a slurring, wobbly man a kiss in order to get my well deserved tip. At this point I could write a damn good book on 'how to not pick up a girl and instead leave her totally repulsed.'
Not all men on vacation are bad. There have certainly been a few who I invited conversation from, and maybe one or two who I would have rather not left the bar or hotel at all.
There will be more pictures to come of my recent Taos adventures.
In less than a month Sarah and I will begin our journey to the Grand Canyon. In a month and a week I will be headed towards Austin. In a month and a half there might be some Montana. In two months I will be HOME.
I am ready to go, but that does not mean I will not be a little sad when March 31st arrives.
I suppose I have a few regrets- maybe I should have tried to make more friends or possibly not written people off quite so quickly. I also should have worked less and instead left more time for exploration of this strange but lovely environment.
Besides those things (which I don't actually completely regret), I am unbelievably proud of myself. I survived four and a half months of bitter cold, loneliness, and men on vacation (I will explain later my absolute abhorring of men on vacation). I was mostly able to stay happy, too; my calls to Katherine complaining about how miserable I was were relatively infrequent.
Its also hard to regret anything when I think of how much I changed, how many things I learned to do, and all of the beauty I was able to experience here. First of all, I was able to make five very good friends, Sarah, Kim, Seth, Bobby and Maria. I hiked so many incredible trails, with and without snow shoes. I learned how to throw pots on a potter's wheel. I went tubing. I learned to ski! I visited an Earthship and befriended a group of wonderful hippie boys who lived inside of it. I learned how to cook and bake a few things all by myself. I sewed a bunch of purses and made a quilt. I read at least a book a week. I wrote a number of half finished stories, and three complete ones that I am sort of proud of. I visited a couple of different hot springs. I perfected my texan accent. I had many fascinating, hilarious, and enjoyable conversations with guests from all over the world. I didn't cry or yell at any of our less pleasant guests. I refused to put up with any shit from any shitty men.
This leads directly to my explanation as to why men on vacation are the WORST. Well, to begin, men on vacation are usually drunk. Drunk men are often awful without being on vacation. When they are on vacation, they are away from the restrictions of their 'normal' life, and act as if they have no restrictions at all. They are loud, rude, clumsy, and unapologetic. This is now my second job dealing with 'men on vacation,' and you wouldn't believe some of the lines I have heard. For the most part, I have never been seriously offended, but I would certainly prefer to live the rest of my life without being asked to accompany another old, hairy, overweight man in the hot tub, or asked to give a slurring, wobbly man a kiss in order to get my well deserved tip. At this point I could write a damn good book on 'how to not pick up a girl and instead leave her totally repulsed.'
Not all men on vacation are bad. There have certainly been a few who I invited conversation from, and maybe one or two who I would have rather not left the bar or hotel at all.
There will be more pictures to come of my recent Taos adventures.
In less than a month Sarah and I will begin our journey to the Grand Canyon. In a month and a week I will be headed towards Austin. In a month and a half there might be some Montana. In two months I will be HOME.
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
ways that i am turning into an elderly person... (no offense, Grandma)
1. I go to bed at 10pm (at the very latest!) every night.
2. On the rare mornings that I can sleep in, I wake up around 7:30 am.
3. I am making a quilt.
4. I wear flannel onesie pajamas to bed most nights.
5. I eat oatmeal for breakfast each morning.
6. I eat ginger cookies at some point of every day.
7. I haven't been able to hike a lot lately because my knees have been bothering me.
8. I get really excited about things like making banana bread.
9. I get really excited about things like going to the library.
10. I get really excited about things like organizing my trunk of things from the "old" days.
11. I have started telling guests to dry their hair before they leave to go ski (I wouldn't want them to catch a cold)
12. I wear supportive slippers all day, every day.
13. I have started watching (and enjoying) daytime television.
14. My only friend in Taos is currently crocheting a blanket, sitting on the couch next to me while I am quilting, and we are both watching daytime television.
Its actually a pretty good life (minus the achey knees).
2. On the rare mornings that I can sleep in, I wake up around 7:30 am.
3. I am making a quilt.
4. I wear flannel onesie pajamas to bed most nights.
5. I eat oatmeal for breakfast each morning.
6. I eat ginger cookies at some point of every day.
7. I haven't been able to hike a lot lately because my knees have been bothering me.
8. I get really excited about things like making banana bread.
9. I get really excited about things like going to the library.
10. I get really excited about things like organizing my trunk of things from the "old" days.
11. I have started telling guests to dry their hair before they leave to go ski (I wouldn't want them to catch a cold)
12. I wear supportive slippers all day, every day.
13. I have started watching (and enjoying) daytime television.
14. My only friend in Taos is currently crocheting a blanket, sitting on the couch next to me while I am quilting, and we are both watching daytime television.
Its actually a pretty good life (minus the achey knees).
Saturday, January 22, 2011
waiting for snow...
Its been almost 2 weeks since we have seen snow. The Austing Haus' business is suffering and I am missing it oh so much.
Luke came to visit me this past week and we had a wonderful time together. Luke is one of the most positive, confident, and hilarious people I have ever met. I really like who I become when I am around him. He will be a dear friend forever and ever.
He got to go skiing (which I still have not done). We visited the Gorge Bridge, of course, and ate at delicious restaurants. When we weren't eating at delicious restaurants, Luke was cooking us delicious food. He made cauliflower au gratin, candied shallots, gruyere cheese covered zucchini, and saltimboca chicken. I spent the last five days in food heaven, and now I have decided that I absolutely need to teach myself to cook. Hopefully no fires will occur and no dishes will break.
The last night that Luke was here, Bobby, one of the owners, secured us a free trip to Ojo Caliente. Ojo is a mineral and hot springs resort for fancy schmancy people. We felt like royalty as we soaked underneath the full moon and watched shooting stars.
I got a little upset one night and complained to Luke about all the loneliness and how I feel as if I am turning colder on the inside. In perfect Luke fashion, he was able to bring up the positive side of all of it while simultaneously showing that he felt sorry for me (that combination of reactions has become necessary for me, unfortunately). At one point after I had been blubbering for a while, he looked at me and said "What you are doing is SO cool, do you realize THAT?! I mean, you are making a quilt at 23!!!" It wasn't the most comforting thing for him to say, because, well, grandmothers make quilts. It did make me laugh a whole lot, and I ended my pity party.
Anyway, here is evidence of my quilt making:
Its being made from my favorite sheet of barren trees and a leaf print. I now have three horizontal rows complete. It takes a long time, but hey- I have got plenty of that!
Luke came to visit me this past week and we had a wonderful time together. Luke is one of the most positive, confident, and hilarious people I have ever met. I really like who I become when I am around him. He will be a dear friend forever and ever.
He got to go skiing (which I still have not done). We visited the Gorge Bridge, of course, and ate at delicious restaurants. When we weren't eating at delicious restaurants, Luke was cooking us delicious food. He made cauliflower au gratin, candied shallots, gruyere cheese covered zucchini, and saltimboca chicken. I spent the last five days in food heaven, and now I have decided that I absolutely need to teach myself to cook. Hopefully no fires will occur and no dishes will break.
The last night that Luke was here, Bobby, one of the owners, secured us a free trip to Ojo Caliente. Ojo is a mineral and hot springs resort for fancy schmancy people. We felt like royalty as we soaked underneath the full moon and watched shooting stars.
I got a little upset one night and complained to Luke about all the loneliness and how I feel as if I am turning colder on the inside. In perfect Luke fashion, he was able to bring up the positive side of all of it while simultaneously showing that he felt sorry for me (that combination of reactions has become necessary for me, unfortunately). At one point after I had been blubbering for a while, he looked at me and said "What you are doing is SO cool, do you realize THAT?! I mean, you are making a quilt at 23!!!" It wasn't the most comforting thing for him to say, because, well, grandmothers make quilts. It did make me laugh a whole lot, and I ended my pity party.
Anyway, here is evidence of my quilt making:
Its being made from my favorite sheet of barren trees and a leaf print. I now have three horizontal rows complete. It takes a long time, but hey- I have got plenty of that!
Luke!
Its Luke and I on a billboard! (don't bother looking closer, its not really us- I just forgot to take pictures at Ojo, so this is our only memory!)
that tree right there is my favorite in all of Taos
If you look close you can see the Gorge
view of my tiny town on the way home from Albuquerque
This place feels like home now.
Friday, January 7, 2011
I am half way through my stay in Taos.
It has been almost a month since my last post. Its been almost 2 months of some pretty remarkable loneliness.
I often wonder what is keeping me here in Taos. Part of it is that I feel as if I have no where else to go.
The bigger part is how beautiful it is here. I love looking out of my window each morning to snowy mountains, and I don't even mind the frigid temperatures. I have never seen sunsets like the ones I get to view here on a daily basis. The mountains turn pink, the sky takes on a tie dye pattern, and the clouds move so fast that they look like giant flying sheets.
I still have not skied, but I intend to go very soon.
I have two options as far as socializing goes, and I don't belong in either place. If I go up the mountain to the resort I am faced with insidious ski bums with lines like "if we kiss now, we will find out whether we are compatible or not for the future, and that will save us a lot of time." and "sick tat, babe." Repulsive people- I am telling you.
The scene down the mountain is a lot easier to bear, but its farther away and the people there are strange too. A lot of older hippies, men who looked like they haven't bathed for two weeks, and your standard weirdos. There is always good music in town though, so if I MUST leave my house to be amongst people, this option is the least offensive.
I have been making a lot of generalizations. There are several exceptions. I really like my coworker and boss, boss' boyfriend, and one of the owners. I also like several of my grocery store cashiers, and the librarians at the Taos library. Maybe I will meet more good people, I have 2 and a half more months to go!
For the time being, I sew simple things, read Alice Hoffman, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, bell hooks, Alice Munro, and Raymond Carver, watch tv and movies, hike, skype with Katherine, and occasionally write something that I am proud of.
Its very difficult sometimes. I get lonely quite often. I work alone, I eat alone, I sleep alone. This building is cold and quiet, especially right now. This is not to say that there are also many occasions that I really appreciate the solitude.
The Christmas time rush was wonderful, we had a full house for about a week and I was busy and able to have multiple conversations with real, live people.
Jack was here for a few days during that time. I love Jack so very much, I don't think I could have a finer man as a best friend. He drove 14 hours out of his way to be in the snow and the cold (which he hates) to be with me for Christmas. We had a great time, and only engaged in a few minor arguments. Hopefully in March I will get out to Austin to visit him.
Here are some pictures from the last month:
I often wonder what is keeping me here in Taos. Part of it is that I feel as if I have no where else to go.
The bigger part is how beautiful it is here. I love looking out of my window each morning to snowy mountains, and I don't even mind the frigid temperatures. I have never seen sunsets like the ones I get to view here on a daily basis. The mountains turn pink, the sky takes on a tie dye pattern, and the clouds move so fast that they look like giant flying sheets.
I still have not skied, but I intend to go very soon.
I have two options as far as socializing goes, and I don't belong in either place. If I go up the mountain to the resort I am faced with insidious ski bums with lines like "if we kiss now, we will find out whether we are compatible or not for the future, and that will save us a lot of time." and "sick tat, babe." Repulsive people- I am telling you.
The scene down the mountain is a lot easier to bear, but its farther away and the people there are strange too. A lot of older hippies, men who looked like they haven't bathed for two weeks, and your standard weirdos. There is always good music in town though, so if I MUST leave my house to be amongst people, this option is the least offensive.
I have been making a lot of generalizations. There are several exceptions. I really like my coworker and boss, boss' boyfriend, and one of the owners. I also like several of my grocery store cashiers, and the librarians at the Taos library. Maybe I will meet more good people, I have 2 and a half more months to go!
For the time being, I sew simple things, read Alice Hoffman, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, bell hooks, Alice Munro, and Raymond Carver, watch tv and movies, hike, skype with Katherine, and occasionally write something that I am proud of.
Its very difficult sometimes. I get lonely quite often. I work alone, I eat alone, I sleep alone. This building is cold and quiet, especially right now. This is not to say that there are also many occasions that I really appreciate the solitude.
The Christmas time rush was wonderful, we had a full house for about a week and I was busy and able to have multiple conversations with real, live people.
Jack was here for a few days during that time. I love Jack so very much, I don't think I could have a finer man as a best friend. He drove 14 hours out of his way to be in the snow and the cold (which he hates) to be with me for Christmas. We had a great time, and only engaged in a few minor arguments. Hopefully in March I will get out to Austin to visit him.
Here are some pictures from the last month:
The moon before the eclipse
Jack !
Christmas decorations in the lobby/ my living room
The Gorge Bridge
New Mexico's version of the Grand Canyon
I live on one of those mountains!
Snowshoeing in my backyard
Heres to hoping that 2011 will be the happiest, most wonderful year of them all!
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